Monday, June 17, 2013

What Legacy Will You Leave?

What Legacy Will You Leave?

This article was originally published on September 2, 2011 here.

Last night my boys & I attended a funeral service for my Aunt Patsy. The minister spoke of how she was always smiling, the love she spread, protective nature, & her deep seated faith in our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ (the Legacy she Left).

I wondered how the funeral service would affect the boys. This was their first funeral service since losing their dad in October of 2009. It was difficult for them.

Aunt Patsy's funeral was totally different than their daddy's for many reasons though. The biggest reason being everyone in the family, distant or close, knew the status of Aunt Patsy's relationship with God. Her funeral really was a celebration of her life!! What Legacy Will You Leave? The boys' father very rarely spoke of faith or of any personal convictions for Salvation. When he passed, there was no celebration, only great sorrow. All hoped he went to a better place, but there was great doubt.

Aunt Patsy was full of life and the fruits of her faith were & are so very obvious!! Her Legacy was strong and prevailed.

When it is your time to part from this life, how will your obituary read? What will others stand around & remember about you? What words will they use to describe you?  

It all suddenly clicked for my boys!!

What Legacy Will You Leave?


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Footprints in Life

Which way will we turn next in our Footprints in Life? What direction do we want to take? What's around the corner? Should we worry about things that we have no control over? Should we spend precious time trying to figure life out? Why do we spin our heels worrying about how our kids will turn out? Why do we become consumed with ideas or thoughts?

In the long run, it doesn't matter which way we are about to turn or what's around the corner. Our Footprints in Life are measured not by our own eyes.

There is no need to worry over things which we have no control.
If we spend precious time trying to figure life out, we miss the here and now.

We can't worry how our children will turn out. We must simply put our best effort in to leading by example, not just leading by words. Our examples will been seen in our Footprints in Life.

We must not allow ourselves to become obsessed by any one thought or idea. Lest we find ourselves stuck in an alternate reality, ever missing the present.

Be still. See with new eyes.
Quiet. Hear with new ears.
Observe.
Take in every moment that God the Father gives us and cherish the amazing favor he has granted us each day.

We have no promise of tomorrow.
We have no bargaining power over life.
When a door closes, a window opens.
The cup is half full, not half empty.
We are resilient creatures, fully capable of healing, regenerating, and restoring  mentally and physically. 

To read the rest of this article, click here.

Whoo Hoo It's Friday!

This article was originally published on July 30,2011 here

Every Friday I hear someone say how excited they are that...
IT'S FRIDAY!!
Why do we get so excited over one day in the week? It's not like Friday is the most aesthetically pleasing day, is the best dressed in designer labels, smells the most delicious, has won a Super Bowl or World Series, can go 10,000 miles without an oil change or gets 100 miles per gallon.

Friday is a silent Hero honored by millions of people all around the world. Friday won't save you, solve problems, feed you, offer financial freedom or security, love you, transform a life, or make you whole - yet it is worshiped.

There are songs that play on the radio that are dedicated exclusively to this 1 day of the week. It's the most exciting day that is observed 52 times a year (or more). The most beloved of all days, it receives more gratitude & praise than Saturday & Sunday combined. The anticipation that Friday dangles in front of us is more exciting than the days it leads to.

Is it because the weekend is sacred? If so, why do we praise the day before? We do a happy dance, smile through the day, & speak lovingly of the long anticipated day that has FINALLY arrived.

We wish our lives away, day by day chanting, "Can't wait till it's Friday", "Friday can't get here quick enough", "I wish it was Friday", "I wish Friday would hurry up".

We complain that there are too many days between today and Friday.

I, like many other billion people, have been guilty of this too.
It's a mystery, this mystical day, highly favored above all others.

Posted from WordPress for Android

Fake Women?

Originally published on July 24, 2011 on Chrissy Adventures

I keep trying to remember and fill in the black holes of my life that I have lost. I don't know why I'm so obsessed with figuring out who I am, what made me who I am, and how I came to this place in life. It's not a bad place to be, so why does it trouble me so much to remember?

Maybe what I've lost are bad memories and I shouldn't pursue them. Maybe I'll be happier not knowing. Maybe, who I am right now is more important than who I was? Maybe all of these maybes are driving me mad!

I instant messaged a friend last night because her smile was so engaging. I thought I must know her well because I was drawn to her like a magnet. She couldn't believe that I didn't remember much about her. I told her I read about hitting my head, so that may be why I couldn't remember much. She must have fallen asleep at her keyboard, because she was typing and just stopped. I got my pictures down & my high school yearbooks to find her. There she was, flaunting that same engaging smile. As I flipped through the book, a note fell out. It was her handwriting. Studying the bubbly circles and loops, I began to remember a little.
I remember she was always smiling. She was outgoing, witty, and great at conversation, but terrible at writing, so I wrote her English papers. She befriended everyone and anyone. She could strike up a conversation with a random stranger. I remember she was the first female friend I had ever trusted. She was genuine and it never occurred to her to be fake. I remember this is why I liked her. She was truly the first female best friend I had ever made.  

Evidently being raised around mostly men, I'm assuming I had trust issues with women. Maybe I still do? Women are fake by nature. I've noticed this just since hitting my head. Perhaps I've always felt this way?
What causes a woman to lie about little things that are not necessary to lie about? They lie to each other & SMILE while they do it.

Just the other day, I heard a woman tell another that she looked great in her outfit. The complimented lady was embarrassed by such an unexpected comment, face reddened a little, then she graciously thanked her, turned and left. Once the other woman was gone, the compliment giving woman turned on the lady while speaking to another woman. "Oh my God, can you believe she's wearing that dress? Her butt looks huge. People like that should dress in their size, not their children's." The other woman replied, "I know! Did you see her hair? Her face is too fat for that haircut. Her double chin is, like, huge now!"

At first, I had a flash back of high school, then it occurred to me that these women were bred this way. Will a tiger never change its stripes?

From what I can remember, a lot of the women I have met were "nice" to each others' faces, but ripped each other to shreds once their backs were turned. Why?

I've witnessed this a lot recently. It's not only confined to appearances. This mindset is wide spread, covering discounting someone's accomplishments, clothing, make up-- to when another woman speaks. It festers, bleeds, and spreads like a virus among women.

Could this primal rage instinct come from the constant comparisons that are made of little girls to Barbies, models, or each others accomplishments? Are girls taught that to be worthy of something great in life, they must stomp out the competition? Do parents realize the consequences of the learned behaviors their children adapt from observation?

I'm a parent & by no means am I perfect. I'm sure my boys are as twisted as the next. My intentions are not to come across as hypocritical. These are just thoughts flowing through my mind as I strive to recover my memories and remember why I am who I am.

I have to say, it does sadden me.
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Only a Mother Could Handle This!

This post was originally published on my primary Blog at Chrissy Adventures at WordPress.
 Join me on my primary blog!


******Warning******This post may induce vomiting

Some people are born with an iron stomach. They can eat anything, smell anything, touch anything and seemingly nothing grosses them out. Others have a very touchy queasy tummy and just can't handle disgusting smells, tastes, or consistencies. These people have what we call a weak stomach. Around here, we have a combination of both kinds ;-)

A few nights ago, my husband and I were watching television in the bedroom. The kids were off doing their own things (playing video games, doing homework, and watching television in the living room).  In the bedroom we were watching Click. It's such a touching comedic movie about how much family and time with loved ones means more than time spent at work making a living.  Here's how the last 2 minutes played out...
Just as Adam Sandler falls to the ground outside the hospital trying to get his son's attention we hear a tiny knock on the door. We ignored it, both thinking once the kids don't hear us answer, they'll wait till the movie has finished. Afterall, this is the touching part. I'm crying and my husband is tearing up too.

Adam Sandler's son runs to him and the rest of the family is surrounding him on the pavement, covering him with umbrellas to keep the rain off him. We hear another tiny knock on the door. " Surely, they can wait till the movie ends", we both think. Several more tiny timid knocks on the door in a row...My husband jumps up, cracks the door and says very quickly, "we're watching a movie. It's almost finished. We'll be out in a minute, Okay?" He shuts the door and sits back down. We finish the movie and Nick says, "Well, let's go see what the boys wanted. XXX had a sad bewildered look on his face."

My husband beats me to it. He's standing in the hallway talking to XXX (my oldest son). "What's going on?"  My oldest answers, "I got sick." My husband cautiously walks to the other end of the hallway as if he's scouting out new territory and peeps around the corner. "C H R I S S Y!!!" He calls to me. About this time I'm in the Hallway on the other end. There's about 15ft between he and I and I hesitate..."What?"
"OH my GOSH, It's horrible. Come here. Oh my...what happened again?" he replies.

"Great, I guess I'd better go", I think to myself. I made my way to the end of the hallway and I see XXX standing there with the most pitiful look on his face. He's pale, sad, and dismayed. I also see a mop bucket and smell the problem. It's nasty...it's vomit...with nasty chunks in it and it's EVERYWHERE. I could tell he attempted to make it to the restroom, but only made it to the door about 7ft shy of his target (the toilet). It dawned on me that we put off answering the door to finish that awesome movie about how important family is and in the process neglected some family right here. How ironic!

"Why are you using a mop to clean up chunks son?" I ask.  Suddenly I hear the other two boys as they peeked out the door of their bedrooms. From the distance I hear, "Hey, yeah...we tried to help him. We gave him the mop and the bucket."

"What?", I exclaim, "you gave him the bucket and mop, then abandoned him? This has been here for at least 10 minutes. This is not fresh. You can't mop up something chunky!!"
"Yeah, well, we don't want to get sick," another son replies as he speaks through his hand covering his mouth. The bedroom door shuts and they disappear. I hear gagging from their room.

My husband just stands there, mesmerized by the puke. Mouth gaping open, trying to figure out how one person could vomit so much in only one event. He even begins to scratch his head and mumble out loud about it. "It looks like there's a dead chopped up body in the floor. What did you eat XXX? How can one person do this much? Oh yuck, it's on the walls all the way in here too. It stinks. Gross. What did you say you ate?" He went on and on...

Rubbing XXX's shoulder, I say "XXX, if you feel better now, please go to your room and lay down. I'll finish cleaning this up." XXX goes to his room saying, "I'm sorry" over and over again. "Don't be sorry honey", I answered his mumbles.

I began gathering the supplies I would need to clean up the nasty mess and my husband is still mumbling trying to figure out what XXX ate. At this point I wanted to burst into laughter, but I was still upset with the other 2 boys that knew very well the mop and bucket would just make a bigger mess. Just as I had almost gathered everything I would need and had removed the bucket and mop, I hear my husband begin to gag.
In my head I'm thinking, "Who wants Chowder?"

He ran to the kitchen sink. He gagged over and over again, but didn't vomit (Thank God! If he had, I would be cleaning the kitchen sink too.) I began to remove the chunks and dispose of them.

About 1/2 way through the chunk removal, my husband says, "Oh yuck, it's in the cat's bowls. Just throw them away." I just kept on cleaning. "It's on the walls Chrissy!" he says. I kept on cleaning. "Honey, LOOK! It's all the way over here too! Just throw that rug away."  I kept cleaning.

In my head, I'm thinking "Who cares what he ate? Thanks for showing me it's in other rooms though. Why are you freaking out?" He gagged a few more times, but I must give him props, he stayed right with me until I was completely finished cleaning the hard wood, the tiles, the base boards, the walls, the toilet, the sink, the hallway, and parts of the living room. He gagged, all three of the boys gagged, but we all survived and no one else got sick!

All this I found comedic because of the irony of the movie vs what my son was trying to tell us, the younger boys hiding in their rooms and abandoning their older brother, XXX gagging as he was trying to clean up his own mess, my husband's odd chatter and wanting to throw everything away, and the cat's reaction was funny too. He paced the floor for over an hour meowing loudly because his precious food bowl and water dish were contaminated!  Between these boy, my husband, and this event - it's a real wonder that I didn't go ape crazy! 

I guess God gives mother's an iron stomach to deal with their families daily. I just never appreciated before how iron my stomach is.

Do's and Don'ts of Cooking

Originally published at Chrissy Adventures at WordPress

Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a fabulous cook. I have never claimed to be. I try though and somehow the boys all seem to be very healthy. Once upon a blue moon, my favorite hang out place was the kitchen. I stayed in there practically all day. If I wasn't cooking, I was cleaning, or sitting at the table reading or paying bills.
Over the years, I have had some serious fiascoes in the kitchen.  In the past, I would deny my bloopers, but the more I think about them - I think hey why not share? After all, I may not be the only under-achieving cook out there.

Do: Make sure you have all the ingredients before you begin cooking.
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Don't: neglect this small yet very important 1st step, you may be running out to a close by local small store to buy important items like (cheese, milk, bread, the main ingredient)

Do: Announce to everyone in the house that you need the kitchen all to yourself if you have a small space.
Don't: Attempt to do the tango with a blazing hot cast iron skillet, a cat underfoot, and kids ducking & weaving in and out of the kitchen. Someone, probably you, will get burnt.
Do: Mix all dry ingredients first
Don't: Throw all ingredients into a bowl and mix on high-speed. (Egg is difficult to remove from the ceiling and dries quickly.)
Do: Clean as you go. Wash your cookware and utensils as you dirty them up.
Don't: Hope the kids will appreciate the meal so much that they will help with the dishes afterwards. Instead they will have a cut on their hand and therefore be disabled for the evening, have a belly too full to help, start their nap early at the kitchen table, have a game that has been on "pause" too long and just have to go, need an hour-long shower, or some other random excuse.
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Do: Only make portions small enough to fit into your left-over storage containers.
Don't: Cook a 25lb turkey or ham without enough storage space for left overs!! You'll end up with the left over meat in every type of container in the refrigerator - Ex: Tupperware, Ziploc bags, Rubbermaid containers, left over butter bowls, Jelly containers, cheese cellophane, Drinking cups with lids, plastic shoe boxes (cleaned of course), sour cream containers, and anything else that has a lid!!  The day after said feast will result in frustration as you cannot find the REAL butter, jelly, sour cream, cottage cheese, etc.
Do: Wear an apron or keep a hand towel handy.
Don't: Forget you are cooking and wipe your hands on your pants.  If you do, you may stick to your chair when you attempt to stand at the end of the meal.
Do: Ensure that any frozen ingredient is not freezer burnt before using.
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Don't: Attempt to convince the kids that it's suppose to taste that way!
Do: Check all dates on canned or dry goods that you bought on sale and found in the very back of  your cabinet before using.
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Don't: Try to convince the kids it's suppose to taste that way.  (If they've fallen for this once, they will be wise to you the 2nd time around!)
Do: Dispose of food packaging in a safe way.
Don't: Leave a can lid standing erect on a can after opening. Gently push the lid down inside the can. Those things will cut you as you take out the trash.
Do: Remove all decorative stove burner (eye) covers before turning the stove on.
Don't: Turn on the wrong stove burner element before you remove decorative covers. Those things are totally flammable!
Do: Keep tongs in the kitchen at all times. They prove to be most handy to remove burning element (eye) covers if you should forget to remove them.
Don't: Make microwavable macaroni and cheese without adding water. It is flammable without water.
Do: Watch boiling noodles on stove top and stir regularly.
Don't: Walk away from boiling noodles on stove top. Again, those noodles are totally flammable!
Do:  Stay in the kitchen when you cook.
Don't:  Lay on the couch to take a nap when cooking.
These are just a few helpful do's and don'ts that may help someone new to cooking. You'd think all these things are common sense, but they aren't. Some of these were my mistakes when I was very young and others have been made by my kids.

We have a great deal more of these I could share. Let me know if you want to read more :-)

Stuff Dad Said

Originally posted at ChrissyAdventures on WordPress

Father's Day is right around the corner literally and I actual went to visit my Dad yesterday. We live very close to each other, but I guess I just am busy with my life and he with his, so we don't get to visit with each other much. Anyway, while on this trip to see Mom and Dad, I started thinking about things he use to say to my brother and I when we were young.
He has a great sense of humor and loves to laugh, although he isn't the best at joke telling himself. He has a very outgoing personality and at times my mother has hidden from everyone in embarrassment at his very open and comfortable presence. (Check out this video to see how impulsively fun he is in public.) I love that about him though!!
Dad never was one much for profanity. He is a baby boomer born in 1945. He had a few different careers early in life even though he only had a 4th grade education, was drafted to Vietnam, married my mother when he returned home, became an entrepreneur, was and still is a talented musician, writer, vocal artist, and adopted my brother and I in the 70's. In 1991 he dove into pastoring the church and has served the ministry since full-time. Rarely did a curse word ever leave his lips, but he did incorporate some slang into his vocabulary from time to time. He would also throw in a few words he thought were "hip" or "cool" from time to time.
Dad, although I know you are not on the internet and will probably never be - here is a tribute to you and the nutty stuff you use to say (and still do).
Got cotton in your ears? That wind'll fool ya!
There's a fine line between faith and foolishness sister...and we're on the line here!
Know what I'm say'n? Do ya dig me?
Sis, stop that! You're a girl!
Trust me, it'll taste good...
Fetch your brother for me.
This here's a little trick I learnt in 'Nam.
Flip!!!!!! (This word would follow his hammer hitting his thumb.)
Don't let your left hand know what your right hand is doin'.
I get the gist of it.
Would you like for me to help you clean your plate? (said with a big hopeful grin)
Now, put this in your spirit... (Insert Advice Here)
Chris, do you ever get tired of talking?
Are you gonna eat that?
Truth in the house! (Always said in church instead of Amen.)
Come to church sometime (said to everyone he ever ran into...ever)
I'm pick'n... (this was followed by an awkward pause until you say "And I'm a grin'n")
Always keep your foot on the rock and your mind made up (This was code for I hid some money for you under a rock that your mom doesn't know about.)
Got everything covered? (Code for do you need any money.)
Now get this, ...(Insert random comment)
Are you reading me?
If you ever hit your sister, you'll have to deal with me.
Jesus never asked someone to take a shower or put on deodorant before he saved 'em.
Your mom said go to bed on time, so could you be quiet enough that she thinks you're asleep?
I did it, it was me. (Proudly proclaimed every time mom found something us kids broke, to save us from the wrath of mom.)
You gotta love people where they're at.
Maybe my dad was 1 in a million? I think so and I thank God for sending me and my  brother to him. I know his life changed after we entered the picture and I appreciate the sacrifices he and mom made for us.
Happy Father's Day Daddy. I love you!!
Mom & Dad - Before Kids
Mom & Dad - Before Kids